2.14.2016

just a little bit of nothing and everything

^^just on our way to school together on a snowy morning^^

Last time I tried this, I blogged three times and then stopped. No promises that this time will be any different. Even though I read and write all day at school, I miss writing. I miss having an online journal of my life with pictures (although I am still very attached to my paper journal). I love looking back on old posts on my blog and remembering events that seemed so big and stressful at the time or all of the craziness and fun of college. So I am trying again.

The past 8 months (I didn’t blog for two years so that’s not that bad, right?) have been busy. Like, I-got-married-busy. One day I will write the blog version of our story--the kind that only highlights the good and none of the emotional ups and downs (nobody needs to read that ha). But according to my mom, I have a realistic bone the size of a femur, so here are a few thoughts from a recently married college kid. 

Some days I look at Chris and think, “are we really married?” It’s still a little surreal that I made the big decision and picked the man who I want to spend the rest of my life with, but it hasn’t even been two months yet so I’m sure it will sink in eventually ;) For now, It’s the never ending sleepover with my best friend that my mom never let me have when I was a kid and IT IS GREAT. Another great thing? Having our own apartment. The walls are cinder block painted stark white, the carpet is specially made to hide stains, and my grandparents lived in the exact same complex 50 years ago but it’s special to us. It’s our place. It’s weird but I like knowing that the dirty dishes in the sink are ours and not a roommate’s. I like being able to keep my towel in the bathroom. I also feel a greater responsibility in keeping our little home clean (sorry past roommates) and I have carried on the tradition of Saturday morning chores, something Chris has lovingly agreed to do with me :)

I pack Chris’ lunch and he (usually) makes the bed. We switch off doing laundry and rotate chores. He makes dinner for me when I get home from class late in the evening. Since we are both going to school, working as TAs, and have homework, I have tried to divide responsibility. That might sound selfish and the wife part of me feels like I should be the one doing all things house, but I know that that kind of pressure (which I put on myself) would stress me out. So for the sake of both our sanity, I’m trying to keep things “equal.” We’re both learning that we have no idea how to be a wife and a husband (how would we?!) so it’s been a  learning process with both laughs and tears. A few months ago we didn’t know how to be each other’s fiance either and I’m sure we’ll go through this again when we become parents.

I’m glad Chris is the one who I get to figure out life with. His patience reminds me daily to try and be kinder and all kinds of better. For that, I am so grateful. 

ps. I know today is Valentine's Day but our V-day weekend isn't over yet so that will give me another reason to write again!

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