There are truly no words to describe the past couple weeks. Even if I wrote for pages and pages, I wouldn’t be able to adequately express what happened. I’m sitting in front of my fireplace (forgot how much I loved it!) and I’m trying to think of how to write what I want to say. First off, I survived my first year of college. What a crazy ride that was. I learned more about myself than I ever thought was possible. I learned a lot academically but maybe not necessarily about the subjects individually haha. One is for sure—I can’t study at home. I have to go on a date with good ol’ Harold B. Lee. Harold and I were basically going steady during finals week. What an insane week. Unless one has experienced a finals week, there isn’t a way to really understand it. It’s a combination of stress, worry, studying, no sleep, stress, studying, and lots and lots of prayer.

Taking a break from studying...

 This last finals week was a little different though than fall semester. During finals week of fall semester, I was looking forward to leaving. I would see my family again, get a break from college life, not have to cook, etc. But I knew that I would be coming back to Provo after two weeks and see mostly everyone again. That wasn’t the case this time around. I knew that after this round of finals, I most likely wouldn’t see the people in my ward ever again, most of all the boys who were leaving for their missions. So as happy as I was to finish finals, I knew that all of the goodbyes were getting closer. I finished finals on Tuesday so that I could have maximum time with the people I cared about. I most likely didn’t do the best on some of my finals, but you know when you reach the point where you can’t study anymore and just need to take the final? I’d hit that wall so I thought what the heck.
After bombing some tests, I had some of the most fun and emotional days of all semester. At this point, everyone is the ward was friendly with everyone and it wasn’t weird to hang out with basically anyone. So I did. I so wish that this had happened earlier in the semester but I’m happy that it happened at all. It took so long for everyone to get past the “getting to know you” part and just become chill with everyone. I loved it but it made goodbyes so much harder. I felt like the world I had finally adjusted to was falling to pieces and it was. It was the end of the mighty fine 129, the end of Heritage Halls, the end of my first year at college. Don’t get me wrong, there are some things I definitely won’t miss but I’ve never really had to say goodbye to so many people I care about and had such an influence on me. Who knew saying goodbye would be so hard.
Coming home is another story all together. Packing was a nightmare and cleaning checks were horrible. But thanks to our moms (Jessica’s mom came too) we got it done in a somewhat orderly fashion. We packed up and headed to our relatives’ house to spend the night. We drove home allllll of Saturday and it was actually a good trip. It was long but I got to spend some quality time with our moms and especially Jessica. I’m so glad she and I roomed together this year. I’m not going to try and sugarcoat it and say it was easy because sometimes it was hard. But we (well..I think she did too) both realized that we’re mature enough to work out our problems, even with our differences. And hey, we’re doing it all over again next year J

And now home. That word encompasses more than it did before. While I was packing in Provo, I kept saying “This sweater can stay here at home, I mean Provo.” Or something like “This will still be here when I come home.” It wasn’t deliberate; Provo has just become my new home. And I felt as if I were leaving my home to go to another home. It was Christmas break x 10. Sooo talk about conflicting emotions. But it’s something I can’t fix and I’m going to make the best of it. There are some definite perks to being home and some downsides as well but might as well accept them for the next 4 months.

My first night I had cat hair and drool all over my bed, shirt, and laptop.
Welcome home.

Hope everyone had a great Easter and congrats if you made it to the end of this post!

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